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The hard part is letting go of the guilt. Guilt for living I didn't even know I had."I reached across the space between us, and wiped his tears from his face, and then my own. "I know what you mean. Could you hold me Mike? I need to feel you holding me."He was across the couch and holding me, hugging me close before I finished, Whispering in my ear, "Shh, I have you. Nothing bad can happen now. I'm here. I won't let you go." Lots of other soothing meaningless words. He gently held my head against his chest and rocked me like a child. I needed that very badly; the comforting feel of being held by a man that cared. My dad used to hold me me that way, but that was years ago, when I was just a girl.After a couple of minutes, I looked up and said," We need to know each other. We ... we need to tell each other our story. But I am so scared, because some of my life I've never told anyone, and I think I should tell you. Can you go first, though? Because I don't think I can, right now.". Rape. Whom ever this was wanted to rape her. She tried to move again but still she was securely tied.Maybe it won't be so bad her told herself. Pretend it's a fantasy. But she couldn't stop shaking or crying. She was tied and gagged and blindfolded. She was going to be one of those bodies you see in the news - found in some forgotten place with parts missing and evidence of sexual crimes.Give. The voice kept saying. Give. But she couldn't; give what? Give how? Then again, maybe this was better. This way she didn't know when the final moment would come.The touch moved up. Her stomach. Her breast. Her shoulder. It had no warmth of it's own. A trick? A ghost? Aliens? Cassi found herself praying that they would do it quickly and painlessly. Of course, why do all this if it was going to be painless?It touched her cheek. Give. The voice said. There was a scent, familiar but elusive. Maybe that will help me later, Cassi thought, If I survive this. Maybe, if I can figure that much out, it.
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